How to Help Your Child Transition into a 2-Home Scenario After Divorce

Going through a divorce can be a tumultuous time for any adult, and for children it can feel like their world is falling apart. It can be confusing for children to have two homes, particularly in the early stages of divorce. But there are ways to bring positivity and excitement to this change, while reducing your child’s stress significantly.

Provide Stability

Help your child adjust to the changes in your family by providing as much stability as possible. Having established routines and continuity between their two homes will help your son or daughter feel safe and secure. You don’t need to have a strict schedule, just routines that your child can expect when they wake up, before they go to bed and when they come home. For example, there’s always a bath or a story before bedtime, and a healthy snack when they get home. Resist the temptation to overcompensate by lavishing your child with gifts, or letting them get away with things they normally would not. Structure in your home will help your children feel calm and stable.

Ease The Transition

Help ease the transition for your children by having a neutral pickup and drop off spot, such as your child’s school. You can drop your son or daughter off at school in the morning, and your ex can pick them at the end of the school day. This also eliminates stress for the child and sad goodbyes. Children are very perceptive and will be keenly aware of any sadness, anger, or frustration you may be feeling if you drop them off at your ex’s new place.

Give Kids Choices

Allowing your child to have a say will help them feel empowered, lessening any feelings they may have about things being out of their control. Have them pick out a new bedspread or pillows to decorate their space, or ask them to decide on a special dinner over the weekend. You can make them their favorite meal, try something new, or they can choose a restaurant they’d like to go to.

Reduce Stress on Arrivals

You can help your child adjust to the changes between two homes by making their arrival from your ex’s house as positive and structured as possible. Come up with a special but simple routine for when they come home. Something pleasant and comforting, such as sharing a snack or playing a game. Resist the temptation to bombard them with questions; let them unwind and process the change in their own time.

 

Your child has two parents living in two separate homes, but they only have one childhood. By remaining a positive force in your child’s life and maintaining stability, you can help them transition into their new normal.

Are you struggling with divorce, and need the support and guidance of a licensed professional? I can help. Please give my office a call today, and let’s schedule a time to talk.

How to Help Your Child Live with a Tic Disorder

Parenting can be complicated for any parent, but for those whose children have a Tic Disorder, it can present unique challenges. You’re not just a parent, you must also play counselor, quasi-medical expert, and school advocate. Supporting and encouraging your child will help them thrive as they’re presented with adversity. Here are some tips to help you help your child live with a Tic Disorder.

Educate Friends & Family

One way to help your child cope is to educate friends, family, and – if necessary – teachers and school administrators about Tic Disorders. As you educate other parents and teachers, they’ll know what to expect and may be more accommodating as challenges arise.

Ignore Tics

It’s important to ignore your child’s tic as it happens. Drawing attention to it or scolding them will likely make it worse. Try not to talk about their tic unless they bring it up, or unless it’s absolutely necessary. You can also try to distract them in a gentle manner with a toy, a game, or something else they enjoy.

Reduce Stress

You can help your son or daughter cope with their Tic Disorder by reducing stress. Making sure that they get regular exercise and eat healthily will help their bodies naturally regulate stress and anxiety. Make sure not to over-schedule your child’s activities, as they will need down time too. Encourage your child to talk about things that are bothering them, then help them problem solve. You can also help reduce your child’s stress by remaining calm yourself in stressful situations.

Good Sleep

Make sure your child gets enough rest at night by establishing a bedtime routine. Just as with adults, avoiding screens (television, tablets and video games) at least an hour before bedtime is important. No one falls asleep immediately upon getting into bed, especially after mental or physical exertion. Make sure they have down time 30 minutes to an hour before bed. You can also help your child by ensuring that you get plenty of rest yourself.

Reassure

Reassure your child tics are common, and there’s no reason for them to feel embarrassed. It’s also a possibility that your child’s tic will subside or go away in a few years, or even a few months.

 

As the parent of a child diagnosed a Tic Disorder, your encouragement will help your child cope with their disorder and over time they’ll grow to become a happy, successful adult.

Are you the parent of a child with a Tic Disorder, and looking for support and guidance? A qualified professional can help. Give my office a call today, and let’s schedule a time to meet.